Sunday, September 22, 2013

174

Everyone has a sound.
No I don't mean a voice
I mean 
a sound. 
The sound of a person. You don't hear it right away though, not like an introduction in an exchange of hands and names, but a sound, or sounds rather.
The sounds are almost rhythmic too, like patterns.
Every person has a sound or several sounds and if you can decipher them from each other, you can know just who's walked into the house, who is using the bathroom, who is in the kitchen. 
The pace of her walking, across the hall, sounds different than mine and he,
knows them both, so well. 
The person has a presence also, and if you are very good, you may not even need listen to the sounds of the person to tell who it is that's there without seeing them.
You just feel them.
She felt different than I,
we both, for him, felt the same. 
It was like this, sounds and sounding in silence. Silences' sound a thick and noiseless layer that is the loudest of all except when interrupted by sounds both familiar and un ---
Could you imagine in a city as noisy and congested as this,
you could hear some nights, the rattle of the laundry machine, a near by shower, the sizzling ash of this three quarter smoked cigarette in the rain. 
The rain. I can hear the rain. 
Sometimes what I think I hear is the sound of passionate breath between breathless kisses is really just a leaking air conditioning unit.
No one makes love quietly any more. At least not in the whispered way that tells me we are the only two people who know we are here and we are the only two people who exist.
Us and our sounds. 
I remember waking up one morning and feeling i could lay there all day long. Is this love? I thought. Or is it just too cold and snowy outside to imagine ever leaving this bed, this embrace?
I would know later, yes, it was love indeed. And that I do like winter. Because beds are warmer then. Or at least they feel warmer.
The sound of sheets. Oh! And then the smell....
Three pigeons come in the morning. For what, I do not know, except that they look perfectly placed and framed in that window, a grey and white speckled alley way, much like their own feathers. 
The pigeons always sound like pigeons , their sometimes amusing coos that sound a lot like cat purrrrs. They will always give themselves away. 


Friday, August 2, 2013

173

Books Go Any/EveryWhere
books for bed
and books for the train
books for sunshine
and books for the rain
books for tears
and books for smiles
books for road tripped travel miles
books for underlining
books for folding
books for borrowing
big books for holding
a book for leisure
a book for learning
a book for pleasure
a book for journaling 
I yearn to earn enough so that 
I might always have a book upon my lap
a cigarette to smoke and a worthy night cap. 
i could read them all and read them again,
start in the middle or maybe the end
take my money, take my love, my comforts
take my dignity, take my clothes
take my plans, I don't need those
but please dear taker, don't take those 
Books Are Any/EveryThing 
Have a thought and write it down
Then take a walk around downtown
Relate the lesson to the life that's
Pulsing by your bedside 
On page forty-five
And sentence two
The place, the word that reminded me of you. 
fuck me fuck me fuck me. 
to crossed eyes and sore thighs so that I can't read any more
And until the only thing that would sober my sexed brain
Is a book. 
Is a four letter word.







Monday, July 22, 2013

172

It's time to shed
That pillbox red
White white white 
Why'd shed auto correct to she'd?
A past tense of herself
She was already leaving her dead skin
feeling the wind and the sun and the stars and the night
For the first time
Thinking a season is only beautiful because it will not last
She'd shed like leaves on a tree
Burnt ones in July
Made to look like autumn 
Time for Springs beginnings
But only after 
A winters sleep. 

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

171

you can't loose anything when you were nothing to begin with.
the goal is to keep subpar
but never be at zero.
because nothing + nothing = +
but there's nothing to us, if we only have us.

the word/sound "OH!" is so poignant right now.


Saturday, June 29, 2013

170

I think I see you as you are as you think you are when you're alone.
I make you feel like not the only one in the room, but the lonely one in the room. I could make a joke or say something that's obvious like comment on the weather. Physical obvious observation obviously a deterrence to what I really want to ask and to what you really want to say. A smile passes It off. That silence of complete un-understanding more deafening than the tone of a woman screaming an orgasmic YES. And more uncomfortable than him not coming but doing all the work. A Conceptual Fuck. I'm used to tripping out in layers of complexity in total silence, layers like that strange flavor of chocolate cake I wanted only after you had described it, having wanted to eat it too. Licking my fingers before I even taste it. Feeling nauseous knowing I will succumb when the fork is to my mouth. And feeling better when we are on a road trip and when we come across a fork in the road, and you will ask me, "which way?" And I will open my mouth and say "left" but in my mind I will think 'did I really mean right?' But then having gone left and having stayed there for a while, and thinking of all the possibilities of right, it will have seemed as mundane as aftertaste, as a party missed, as the morning after, as pineapple or fruit punch. It's all just different combinations of dust and sugar and air.

169

I'm feeling nostalgic
For a summer in New York,
How could it be already a year since?
I'm feeling nostalgic and so I am here recreating what that first summer,
what last summer felt like,
Heat too hot to think,
An excitement of a new place,
A city burning underneath my fire escape
It looks grimey but there's no other place right now in the world id rather be than to be as lonely as the last cigarette
With cheap white wine and a book
Thinking of you...

Thursday, June 27, 2013

168


What brought you to New York?
Television.
Oh, you saw it in a movie?
Yes, but that's not why.
Why then, you said television
Yes but because
The city is too transient for Television.
That's what brought me here.
That's what will keep me here.
not physically cause static is movement.
And when there's static on the television, we turn.
But that's what will always draw me here
The comfort of an unworking Television
The constant static
Reminding me to move
But always feeling like this is home
Like when i've drifted off to sleep to the sound of a static snowstorm
Waking up and going properly to bed
Only until morning, when the news the news it starts again.

167

Dread, White & Blue

A subway terminal is where everyone sort of drones. Listen to the sounds in a subway terminal as different as they are it's all just DRONE their faces DRONE the paces DRONE the train the rain the yellow the window panes everything DRONE DRONE DRONE
But maybe the drones can protect the plants from insects, so we don't have to spray.

Friday, May 24, 2013

165

the pinch

i have that pain again
in the back of my back
between my shoulder blade and spine
the pain i used to get when i missed you
but i forgot to
the pinch would remind me
remind me of you
i can't quite name it
that part of my back that hurts
or that thing that's not there
i guess that's what they call missing
something felt
not quite seen
not quite named
just felt
A pain

164

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Thursday, April 25, 2013

161

Somewhere in #nyc

Chances to daydream
But the city went on forever
Moving slowly
The bridge lines racing past
Obscuring that slow moving vast landscape
With fast paced dreams and feet
It's sheer size made it almost immovable
Yet such a sturdy sight was
Falling nervous inside
With paper people dreaming well into the night
Guided by city lights
Oh now what then
It's nearly ten
I think we should move slowly, quickly elsewhere

Sunday, April 14, 2013

160

The improbable probably of impossible situations

Friday, April 5, 2013

156

Red Wine Revelations: Poem 119 written by Lauren Festa originally posted on youtube.com/watch?v=sO25CbLI7-g As interpreted by Glenn Michael for Lovefuck Model - Vanessa Coco Assistant Director - Vincent Tran Production Assistant - Loretta MK Sound and Editing - Glenn Michael

Thursday, March 21, 2013

155

america is everything I'm not.

the land of opportunity yes
i am opportunistic
but in this way that is not the method of the American man
he would rather have you use a language that is inclusive - brash
the occasional F-bomb is not so badly looked upon
being extra careful about word choices
means dumbing it down a notch, throwing the ball around
getting to the point and saying what you mean
if he says "thats interesting" it may not actually be
the American man will not raise his eyebrows at blunt criticism, but would raise them at the word "perhaps"
"Why not transport yourself to Tuscany with our new rustic Mocha Frappulacocinno?" so a sign would read in a place not America,
but the American man has no time for day dreaming about Tuscany in his morning jaunt
he wants to be told "TRY THIS NEW FRAPPUCCINO". NOW.
If the sign does not compel his simplest desires, he will not care to think if he needs them
someone elses wealth should be a part of yours to take,
a competitive outlook may be seen as sociopathic
the team effort, the group effort, are you part of our scene?
but then the communists ---
this American man with no culture but morale for days
he finds it in magazines and advertisements
and he crafts many a positive phrase
into songs, and they respond,
his happy groupie co-people
if i meet you, we're eating
If i like you we'll get breakfast
if i know we'll get lunch
If I want to bed you well get dinner but we won't eat
and talk business only in the day time only then, but after five I'm not alive
to you
get on board and be part of the fun - swallow that slippery free buffet and
get happy on 3 dollar well drinks
my weekend is my weekend the days are ridged,
t.g.i.f. is about the worst American acronym
its like you have earned the right to sit on a couch and do nothing
but loose your mind to television and stuff you face with preservative cheese styrofoam crisps they call Cheetos and try to get you to believe cheetahs could sustain on these and happily ride surf boards
America, you're everything I'm not
Your big, loud and 99cents
sloppy, filthy, wrought with sloth
Craving formality, grace, and wine
for a double espresso there is always time
if you don't get it we're not sorry
there's no team, theres only I
Beautifully we stand as individuals ---
Truth telling is not so dishonestly rude as to have me keep telling me I'm annoyed through smiling teeth.
realness, crudeness, rudeness, and wit
American man you just might quit at the thought of it
of refusal,
You would rather eat peanut butter with a spoon
Than have delicate peanut oil
On a prune
Or fill up a room with its scent
A hundred degrees above the thirteenth floor
You would rather be sticky and order a whore
Yes in America,
write for the dumb, speak for the deaf, work for the weak, and PRAY for the best
… big, beautiful and shiny,
but New York City…. now that place is pretty…
it's dreams, hopes, frustrations, energy, and history,
You can feel it seep up from cobblestones
Those souls of artists past
a place that made them the best and worst version of themselves a place to make you the best version of yourself, or the worst;
A place to make IT.
or is it different? might it just be romanticized?
a bosom is a pair of tits here, still.
was New York just a magnified boiling petri dish of all things American?
from sea to shining sea
and filth ridden shores
perhaps,
yet, we have to catch the diamond glittering in the rough.
It's called the American Dream, cause you have to be asleep to believe it...
I'm still not entirely unbelieved

To live past the end of your myth is a perilous thing.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

154

in the next room
They were having
a familiar conversation
She said the things
I had said to him
And I knew just then
how very wrong I'd been.

153

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

151

I'm not talented.
But I am a genius.

Post mordem.

I'm not talented,
But I am curious.
Infinitely curious.
And there is a whole universe to meet...
Hi,
How are you,
My name is curious ,
What's yours ?

Tuesday, January 29, 2013